Love on the young side...

Im really not understanding. Why the hell does every child in school feel he need to tell every single person they date, that tehy love them, want to be with them forever and never want to loose them...because they make them soooo happy. ?? i dont understand it. Because first off i doublt you love them, you most likely wont marry them, and you are proly going to looses them.
YVOSDIgb;kjhdvf;dhvns;v!!!

I dont get it. is it because they are stupid? i dont think so, because nobody is stupid, so you cant say that. Is it because they are childish? maybe. or is it because its just what you do.
is that what all the kids these days are doing? WHy wasnt i told this? Was it a secret? a message sen to everyone but me? i dont understand. huh, tis a thing to ponder.

Staring

I dont like the question.
the question that they say has no wrong answer.
But everyone knows that there is a right answer. And if you dont know it...well then why bother even answering.
But the funny thing is the answer that everyone thinks is right, reall is wrong. And the answer that you, you the different one. And you the one that tey thought was wrong, the one they thought was odd. you were the right one.
And now when they all answer th "right" answer. Grinning their foolish grins that all look the same. And you break their line, shatter their grins and give the right answer. your right answer. you can stare into their eyes. Not in anger or hate. Not even in competition. But in a way that says, "Im not you, Im not going to be you, and thats why i can answer the right answer. and not the "right"answer."
Thats what you can say. Say with your stare.
Thats what i said.

Dear My Love...

Dear My Love,
Today i wanted to cry. I wanted to lay down and weep like a sky split by God. Like i was crying out all the pain i had ever had in my life. But i cant.
i cant cry. Cant because i need you. Need you so much. I miss you.
I lay awake at night waiting, hoping that maybe i will hear a creak and then a rock hit my window, and to look down and see you standing there.
Or maybe the phone will ring and it will be you, asking me to pack a bag and meet you at the end of my driveway.
I smile all day.
But inside im screaming. Screaming because i can feel us falling apart. But it goes away when we see each other again. But thats the problem. If we only see each other one day everyweek i cant breathe. im screaming for you. SCREAMING.
cant you hear me calling you. I need you so bad.
So please come see me.
Come hold me.
Tell me its ok.
Kiss my forehead.
Wrap your arms around me.
lay me down.
press your skin to mine.
take my hand
place it on your heart
as you place yours on mine.
you caress my skin.
and the screaming stops.
the tears fall.
but not long
because i know its all going to be ok. I just need to lay with you. And you wont leave, because you love me. And i love you.
I will be waiting for you, tonight as i lay in my bed...not sleeping. I will be listening for you.

Broken Pieces

The new is good. But not if your scared of it. I am scared of it. Scared that i will not know what to do. Scared that i will Break in the process. Then who will see me? If im broken am i useless? Unwanted and ignired? Or will somebody walk by and say, as if they were looking at a building that was once filled with humans,
"i bet she was once stunning. I bet she had a man that loved her. I wonder what happened to her?"
If i could speek i would tell them,
"I was scared. I didnt know what to do. So i didi the best thing i could. I just closed my eyes. Closed them and fell into pieces. I was scared."

Things I wish My guardians knew...

The things i wish my guardians knew...
-If im tired i will sleep. dont wake me up to tell me that i shouldnt be sleeping because its the middle of the day.
-If im being quiet i dont want to talk or be talked to.
-Im not invisible, so please realize when i am in the room.
-Yes im a child, but i can think just as good as you can.
-I am smart.
-Just because thats what you think doesnt mean thats whats right.
-I dont have to have the same beliefs as you, but if you respect mine i will respect yours.
-Dont walk away when im mad.
-sometimes i want to just sit around and do nothing
-Stop nagging
-If im sick, im sick.

Him.

He's one of those people that can talk to anybody, but he doesnt talk to someone unless he finds them interesting. He necer seems to be at a loss for words. He always has an anser. He tells the truth. He can make you feel like a goddess and a demon at the same time. He will point out your flaws, but loves you all the more deeply because of them. And shows you how you are so much more human because of them. But he will look into your eyes and tell you exactly why he loves you, and he can go on for hours without pausing to think. And you know that if it were anyone else telling you that, you wouldnt believe them. But when he says it you trust him brcause you know that he knows he isnt obligated to do or say anything to you.
He wants you to strive past what you thought you were capable of. He wants you to know you can be better, know that you are better. But he gave up on himself a long time ago. He can read you like you cut yourself in half. But you could never see into his soul, because he is afraid of what you will see. So he hides it from everyone.
He will do anything for you just because he wants you to be so happy you cant even see straight. He will remember the small things. If he cares about you he wants you to know it. He wont ever leave you, but he will never chase after you either. He never wants nor cares. He just keeps breathing.

The Beginning

I am new to this. I have never written before, well as a hobby at least. But i have small moments of screaming inmy head. And i decided that the best way to expell was to place it on a written format. So from this point foreward this is me screaming. THis is going to be my thoughts or opinions. anything that makes a movement in my mind that i feel should be written for eyes. Thats all i guess. If you have any questions at all, i would love you to ask them. I suppose thats all that needs sayiing at this moment of time. Thank you.

P.S. Spelling was never my forte...just to forewarn

Blind Eyes

If i opened my mouth and spilled words, would you be afraid of what i would mumble or scream? Or would you just ignore the sound protruding so unwelcome from my mouth? Or would you stop? Stop and hesitate, stop and stare? Stop and listen maybe? Listen to my words, finding interest in what i say. Taking my sound and processing it to the fullest. Not just hearing it, but understanding it, and feeling it. Because you need to hear it. As a human in this world, going through ignoring, and uncomprehending. You. You here, and you now.
Need.
To.
Hear.
You need to hear how my thoughts spin, and when i blink i see everything. Everything. Only its four thousand times harsher. I see the world. And i know Earth's hate, and Earth's love. I can see the world dying, can see it suffocating, choking and the lights slowly going out, while at the same time, getting so bright. So bright that we cant even see the plasma in the sky at night anymore, and its going to be gone forever. Thats what we are doing. Ignoring the stars. So listen to me. When i open my mouth. Even if you're afraid. Because i know what is happening, i can see it. Even if your eyes are blind.